Whoops! I ran off and forgot to tell you. Disculpame, por favor. I went ahead and started using WordPress and didn't notify you fine folks. Better late than never, right? You can find me at www.shambulating.wordpress.com. All the sass, and a cleaner look. Could you ask for anything more? Soon, I'll be migrating all of the content from this site over there, but for now, I still have all of my Guatemala content up there. I'll never leave you without the Shambulations you love.
¡Buen provecho!
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Disaster Squared
What a tragic past few days. I feel horrible right now. Physically, I'm fine as far as I can tell (although, let's face it, I'm surrounded by large hills and major volcanoes, so there could be a landslide at any moment). But, I'm so very sad about everything that's going on around me. I don’t know if I’ve ever felt such a sense of tragedy. Guatemala has no resources. Zip. Zero. Zilch. Then a major eruption of Pacaya volcano on Thursday night coated the city in ash, shutting down the airport and costing valuable tourism dollars. The whole city shut down, including schools. The president declared a state of emergency for 15 days. But that's nothing. Three people lost their lives. Almost 1,000 homes were lost in the eruption and about 2,000 people were displaced. Reports from Guatemala City said that parts were buried under up to 5 inches of ash.
I have to admit, with all measure of embarrassment, I was a little amused and amazed when this happened. I had JUST arrived and a volcano was erupting? Are you kidding me?! A volcano erupted and the project was closed and I could’t work with the kids. It all just seemed so ridiculous. Of course, it’s horrible to laugh at something like this. Perhaps that was my way of dealing with what otherwise would have been a major freak out. I gave up my apartment, my unemployment check, my whole world to come down here. Was everything gone in an instant?
Then the world really fell apart. Pacaya wasn’t even done with the major eruption when tropical storm Agatha hit in full force on Saturday morning. Guatemala’s infrastructure is extremely precarious. Roads are in poor shape. Houses in rural areas are often made of nothing more than tin erected on a hillside, with floors of dirt. Many of Guatemala City’s poorest neighborhoods have houses of the same. Most of the people evacuated from Pacaya are in makeshift shelters.
Entire communities are being swept off of hillsides. Already 74 people have died in Guatemala alone (9 more in El Salvador and 2 in Honduras). The ground is so beyond saturated that there's nowhere for the rain to go. And, yet, it's getting stronger by the minute. One entire neighborhood in the capital was obliterated by a mudslide yesterday; 4 were confirmed dead and another 11 missing. They couldn't even continue searching for them because the power was out at nightfall.
That’s not the worst of it. Guate (Guatemala City) lies in a fairly deep valley. From what we’ve heard here in Antigua, some areas of Guate are under water chest-deep. Not only was up to 30 inches of rain unleashed on some areas, but that rainwater was all funneled down into the city, where drainage systems were clogged with ash. In Guate, a sinkhole the size of a building opened up. An entire intersection literally just collapsed. A highway bridge into the city was swept away by floodwaters. Parts of roads have been carried off into the ether or buried under landslides. Entire communities are without power, and will be so for at least several days. The storm has delayed the reopening of La Aurora airport through at least Tuesday. Even if there were supplies coming in, with roads out, it will be incredibly difficult to get supplies to the hardest hit areas.
This all only a minor inconvenience for me, especially when compared to what some people are suffering as a result of the compounded fury of nature. I just can't stop thinking about all of our families sitting in their homes with tin sides and a dirt floor and wonder how they can possibly make it through. Hopefully we will be able to get back to work with our youth and families soon. The volunteer bus can’t travel yet because of the roads, but they will try to open tomorrow and see if there are enough staff and volunteers who can make it from the city to keep the program running. My project is in the very north of the city. This provides a big measure of relief, as at least they weren’t impacted much by the ash. From what I’ve heard, our families and youth are okay, but it seems so incredible to me that this could be true. A combined total of almost 80,000 people were displaced because of these disasters, probably thousands more than would have been affected if they had happened separately. In an area with so few resources already, I can’t imagine what it will look like to put the pieces together again.
As I’ve said, Guatemala is already strapped for resources. This is going to dearly cost the tourism industry here, as you can’t vacation in a country that is currently impassable. The effects of Pacaya and Agatha are also estimated to have serious effects on the coffee crop, which is Guatemala’s chief export. The lack of reliable technology and the loss of infrastructure over the past few days means there is no reliable estimate of that that loss will look like. Not only will Guatemala have to spend a fortune cleaning up, rebuilding and tending to those who are displaced, it has sustained a serious loss of revenue.
My heart aches for Guatemala. If you can find a silver lining in all of this, I’m just grateful I can be here to lend whatever support I can to cleaning up and moving on from all of this mess.
I have to admit, with all measure of embarrassment, I was a little amused and amazed when this happened. I had JUST arrived and a volcano was erupting? Are you kidding me?! A volcano erupted and the project was closed and I could’t work with the kids. It all just seemed so ridiculous. Of course, it’s horrible to laugh at something like this. Perhaps that was my way of dealing with what otherwise would have been a major freak out. I gave up my apartment, my unemployment check, my whole world to come down here. Was everything gone in an instant?
Then the world really fell apart. Pacaya wasn’t even done with the major eruption when tropical storm Agatha hit in full force on Saturday morning. Guatemala’s infrastructure is extremely precarious. Roads are in poor shape. Houses in rural areas are often made of nothing more than tin erected on a hillside, with floors of dirt. Many of Guatemala City’s poorest neighborhoods have houses of the same. Most of the people evacuated from Pacaya are in makeshift shelters.
Entire communities are being swept off of hillsides. Already 74 people have died in Guatemala alone (9 more in El Salvador and 2 in Honduras). The ground is so beyond saturated that there's nowhere for the rain to go. And, yet, it's getting stronger by the minute. One entire neighborhood in the capital was obliterated by a mudslide yesterday; 4 were confirmed dead and another 11 missing. They couldn't even continue searching for them because the power was out at nightfall.
That’s not the worst of it. Guate (Guatemala City) lies in a fairly deep valley. From what we’ve heard here in Antigua, some areas of Guate are under water chest-deep. Not only was up to 30 inches of rain unleashed on some areas, but that rainwater was all funneled down into the city, where drainage systems were clogged with ash. In Guate, a sinkhole the size of a building opened up. An entire intersection literally just collapsed. A highway bridge into the city was swept away by floodwaters. Parts of roads have been carried off into the ether or buried under landslides. Entire communities are without power, and will be so for at least several days. The storm has delayed the reopening of La Aurora airport through at least Tuesday. Even if there were supplies coming in, with roads out, it will be incredibly difficult to get supplies to the hardest hit areas.
This all only a minor inconvenience for me, especially when compared to what some people are suffering as a result of the compounded fury of nature. I just can't stop thinking about all of our families sitting in their homes with tin sides and a dirt floor and wonder how they can possibly make it through. Hopefully we will be able to get back to work with our youth and families soon. The volunteer bus can’t travel yet because of the roads, but they will try to open tomorrow and see if there are enough staff and volunteers who can make it from the city to keep the program running. My project is in the very north of the city. This provides a big measure of relief, as at least they weren’t impacted much by the ash. From what I’ve heard, our families and youth are okay, but it seems so incredible to me that this could be true. A combined total of almost 80,000 people were displaced because of these disasters, probably thousands more than would have been affected if they had happened separately. In an area with so few resources already, I can’t imagine what it will look like to put the pieces together again.
As I’ve said, Guatemala is already strapped for resources. This is going to dearly cost the tourism industry here, as you can’t vacation in a country that is currently impassable. The effects of Pacaya and Agatha are also estimated to have serious effects on the coffee crop, which is Guatemala’s chief export. The lack of reliable technology and the loss of infrastructure over the past few days means there is no reliable estimate of that that loss will look like. Not only will Guatemala have to spend a fortune cleaning up, rebuilding and tending to those who are displaced, it has sustained a serious loss of revenue.
My heart aches for Guatemala. If you can find a silver lining in all of this, I’m just grateful I can be here to lend whatever support I can to cleaning up and moving on from all of this mess.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Found but Not Lost
My head is reeling, but in the best way possible. Info is being crammed into my head left and right; I’m stuffing it into all my little cerebral squirrel pouches for safekeeping. I’m starting to get a feel for the program, poco a poco, although I’m still pretty lost on the overall structure of Camino Seguro. When my poor little brain can’t take anymore, I break for some quality coloring time. Those Star Presentation buttons won’t make themselves. Gah, I love that coloring is an acceptably productive use of time.
I miraculously already feel like I’m learning my way around here. I’ve already covered the three most important things in life: wine, yoga and 2-for-1 sushi. Falafel (we’ll call her an alternate) was also found. I’ve located a famous bakery nary 3 blocks from my house, to boot. I’ll be spending many a Sunday morning selecting from a myriad of gourmet doughy concoctions (for a mere Q5!) and swindling the barista into giving me a discount on coffee with my dizzyingly delightful Spanish. Watchate!
After 3 days, I ran into someone I know on the street in Antigua. It took me 3 years to do that in San Francisco. On Friday, we had a volunteer happy hour, and I ran into one of the Camino staff on the way. I won’t say it didn’t make me feel good to be one of the cool happy hour kids. The evening was delightful – we played darts and went salsa dancing – and I felt really lucky to have a chance to connect socially with the other volunteers right away. I’ve run into someone I know on the street every day since Friday. It’s extremely comforting to have this – both that I’m starting to meet people, and that other folks are milling about. I wasn’t nervous at all about coming to Guatemala in terms of my safety. I know the risks, know a lot of great tactics for taking care of myself and had made peace with the fact that I’ll probably have some minor run-in at some point. I mean, who doesn’t get robbed in Guatemala? Just don’t schlep everything with you, give them what little you have on you and walk away relatively unscathed. No big deal. But, I received some pretty dire warnings my first day or two here which really put a scare into me. That’s being quelched now that I’m learning my way around and seeing people out and about. Not many things bug me more than fear mongers; I do NOT want to be that person.
On Friday we had an excursion with about 200 mothers of Camino Seguro youth. The sports team planned a variety of activities and games for them, including kickball and trivia. My favorite was the Alf piñata. Least favorite: scary clown piñata. I was stationed all day at aerobics with a Camino teacher who will forever after be known in my head only as Ricardo Simmons. Not only is he a spritely little aerobics-guru-cum-sports-teacher-for-underprivileged-youth, he’s also a cage fighter. Yes, a real, live, MMA, no holds barred cage fighter. I can’t wait to go watch a fight. This is about the last thing I ever thought I’d be interested in. But, dude, I’m in Guatemala. What the hell?
The mothers were absolutely ridiculous on Friday. They were so ready to let loose because they have no opportunity to do so in daily life, struggling to put food on the table, raising a family and often doing so with no patner. It surprised me how much they threw caution to the wind; I thought they would be too shy. I guess it’s cultural™. One thing is for sure: what happens at Camino, stays at Camino. I’ll just say my jaw dropped more than a few times.
Sunday was phenomenal. I met up with 8 or so volunteers and a few others for a game of ultimate frisbee. One of the guys is a motorcycle tour guide. Love it. We played for a few hours. Now the existence of a whole lot of muscle groups is glaringly obvious. I’m sure watching me walk the past 2 days has provided more than a couple of chuckles. Clearly, getting in shape is in order. I’d say take it with the proper grain of salt that we’re the self-proclaimed Guatemalan National Ultimate Frisbee Team, but it’s probably pretty accurate. Ang and Nate, the Canadian couple who play, actually are semi-pros. Nate has traveled far and wide for ultimate championships, a fact proven by his frisbee proudly labeled Maple Plain, MN. Afterward, we went for rooftop Argentine barbecue and Gallo beer (the only Guatemalan brew) at a nearby hostel. A table of Minnesotans sat behind me. What is the world telling me?!
I miraculously already feel like I’m learning my way around here. I’ve already covered the three most important things in life: wine, yoga and 2-for-1 sushi. Falafel (we’ll call her an alternate) was also found. I’ve located a famous bakery nary 3 blocks from my house, to boot. I’ll be spending many a Sunday morning selecting from a myriad of gourmet doughy concoctions (for a mere Q5!) and swindling the barista into giving me a discount on coffee with my dizzyingly delightful Spanish. Watchate!
After 3 days, I ran into someone I know on the street in Antigua. It took me 3 years to do that in San Francisco. On Friday, we had a volunteer happy hour, and I ran into one of the Camino staff on the way. I won’t say it didn’t make me feel good to be one of the cool happy hour kids. The evening was delightful – we played darts and went salsa dancing – and I felt really lucky to have a chance to connect socially with the other volunteers right away. I’ve run into someone I know on the street every day since Friday. It’s extremely comforting to have this – both that I’m starting to meet people, and that other folks are milling about. I wasn’t nervous at all about coming to Guatemala in terms of my safety. I know the risks, know a lot of great tactics for taking care of myself and had made peace with the fact that I’ll probably have some minor run-in at some point. I mean, who doesn’t get robbed in Guatemala? Just don’t schlep everything with you, give them what little you have on you and walk away relatively unscathed. No big deal. But, I received some pretty dire warnings my first day or two here which really put a scare into me. That’s being quelched now that I’m learning my way around and seeing people out and about. Not many things bug me more than fear mongers; I do NOT want to be that person.
On Friday we had an excursion with about 200 mothers of Camino Seguro youth. The sports team planned a variety of activities and games for them, including kickball and trivia. My favorite was the Alf piñata. Least favorite: scary clown piñata. I was stationed all day at aerobics with a Camino teacher who will forever after be known in my head only as Ricardo Simmons. Not only is he a spritely little aerobics-guru-cum-sports-teacher-for-underprivileged-youth, he’s also a cage fighter. Yes, a real, live, MMA, no holds barred cage fighter. I can’t wait to go watch a fight. This is about the last thing I ever thought I’d be interested in. But, dude, I’m in Guatemala. What the hell?
The mothers were absolutely ridiculous on Friday. They were so ready to let loose because they have no opportunity to do so in daily life, struggling to put food on the table, raising a family and often doing so with no patner. It surprised me how much they threw caution to the wind; I thought they would be too shy. I guess it’s cultural™. One thing is for sure: what happens at Camino, stays at Camino. I’ll just say my jaw dropped more than a few times.
Sunday was phenomenal. I met up with 8 or so volunteers and a few others for a game of ultimate frisbee. One of the guys is a motorcycle tour guide. Love it. We played for a few hours. Now the existence of a whole lot of muscle groups is glaringly obvious. I’m sure watching me walk the past 2 days has provided more than a couple of chuckles. Clearly, getting in shape is in order. I’d say take it with the proper grain of salt that we’re the self-proclaimed Guatemalan National Ultimate Frisbee Team, but it’s probably pretty accurate. Ang and Nate, the Canadian couple who play, actually are semi-pros. Nate has traveled far and wide for ultimate championships, a fact proven by his frisbee proudly labeled Maple Plain, MN. Afterward, we went for rooftop Argentine barbecue and Gallo beer (the only Guatemalan brew) at a nearby hostel. A table of Minnesotans sat behind me. What is the world telling me?!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
What a Waste
I saw the garbage dump today. It was a seething, teeming mass of garbage trucks, bulldozers, people, dogs and vultures. It was perhaps the most starkly depressing thing I have ever seen. People grab onto the trucks to claim the right to the 500 tons of garbage that are added every day. They walk along side it, almost looking like pallbearers. When the trucks dump their load, the people immediately descend upon it to stake their claim to anything that can be recycled for money, used in the home or eaten. It is not uncommon for the guajeros to eat days old meat they find, after re-cooking it over fires made from burning trash. Spontaneous fires erupt from the methane gas pouring from the dump. Garbage trucks often sink under their own weight after heavy rains, particularly dangerous because of the two subterranean rivers that run underneath the dump. The edges are filled with tent cities made of materials scavenged in the dump, housing an estimated 10% of those working in the dump. A family scavenging the dump may make Q10-15 per day, which is $1.23-1.84. Guajeros must register and pay a fee to work in the dump; those who can’t afford it sneak in on a path along the northwest side. Along the northeast side is a cemetery. Families must pay Q250 per year to keep their gravesite. If a family can’t pay, their relatives’ bodies are exhumed and thrown over the cliff into the mounds of garbage below.
These remains are added to the guajeros that die from being crushed under garbage trucks or buried under trash avalanches. There is no real way to know how many are lost, especially because many are unregistered. Death isn’t the only threat of work in the dump. Severed limbs are not altogether uncommon. People contract HIV and other diseases from medical waste. It is easy to fall in the uneven mounds and get breaks and sprains. Inevitable cuts caused from sharp edges are easily infected. Life is not just difficult when you’re in extreme poverty. Each day is a literal struggle to survive.
So, this is why I’m so upset about how we approach our possessions in the U.S. People just throw things away without a care. If you decide you don’t like something anymore, you just throw it away. It doesn’t matter if it’s still functional. Why are we so wasteful? It’s not just Guatemala City’s dump that’s filling so fast. We’re living far beyond our means as a planet. We have a floating garbage mass in the Pacific twice the size of Texas to prove it. I heard a number of times in regards to my preparation for Guatemala, “Don’t bring stuff. Just toss it and you can replace it for cheap when you get down there.” Just throw something perfectly good away so I can replace it when I go work to get people out of the garbage dump?! You’ve got to be out of your mind.
These are the exact mechanisms and processes that help keep people poor. Instead of being so gluttonous and wasteful, think of how much that wealth could potentially be redistributed if we would just really use what we have. Now, I’m not naive enough to think that money and goods would automatically be redistributed to poorer places if Westerners didn’t buy in to this culture of consumption. What I am saying is that there is a huge potential there.
What if every time you thought about buying something you didn’t need, you could send it to someone who did need it instead? Remember that sweater you bought on sale last year and has been hanging in your closet ever since? I won’t lie, when I left the U.S., I found several shirts with the tags still on them that I had purchased years before. Why were they still around? Why did I get them in the first place? The truth is, I got them to impress somebody. What if instead of falling into the trappings of keeping up with the Joneses, we focused our energy on making sure everyone at least had what they need? What would a world like that look like? I bet it would be a much happier place than the world we live in now. Crime would go down. Preventable diseases would diminish. Instead of worrying about where the next meal is coming from or how to keep a roof over one’s head, people could spend time with the neighbors. Or, better yet, energy could be focused on even more ways to improve one’s community.
That’s a world I want to live in. Sadly, I’m not sure if we have the heart to do it. We like our trappings too much.
These remains are added to the guajeros that die from being crushed under garbage trucks or buried under trash avalanches. There is no real way to know how many are lost, especially because many are unregistered. Death isn’t the only threat of work in the dump. Severed limbs are not altogether uncommon. People contract HIV and other diseases from medical waste. It is easy to fall in the uneven mounds and get breaks and sprains. Inevitable cuts caused from sharp edges are easily infected. Life is not just difficult when you’re in extreme poverty. Each day is a literal struggle to survive.
So, this is why I’m so upset about how we approach our possessions in the U.S. People just throw things away without a care. If you decide you don’t like something anymore, you just throw it away. It doesn’t matter if it’s still functional. Why are we so wasteful? It’s not just Guatemala City’s dump that’s filling so fast. We’re living far beyond our means as a planet. We have a floating garbage mass in the Pacific twice the size of Texas to prove it. I heard a number of times in regards to my preparation for Guatemala, “Don’t bring stuff. Just toss it and you can replace it for cheap when you get down there.” Just throw something perfectly good away so I can replace it when I go work to get people out of the garbage dump?! You’ve got to be out of your mind.
These are the exact mechanisms and processes that help keep people poor. Instead of being so gluttonous and wasteful, think of how much that wealth could potentially be redistributed if we would just really use what we have. Now, I’m not naive enough to think that money and goods would automatically be redistributed to poorer places if Westerners didn’t buy in to this culture of consumption. What I am saying is that there is a huge potential there.
What if every time you thought about buying something you didn’t need, you could send it to someone who did need it instead? Remember that sweater you bought on sale last year and has been hanging in your closet ever since? I won’t lie, when I left the U.S., I found several shirts with the tags still on them that I had purchased years before. Why were they still around? Why did I get them in the first place? The truth is, I got them to impress somebody. What if instead of falling into the trappings of keeping up with the Joneses, we focused our energy on making sure everyone at least had what they need? What would a world like that look like? I bet it would be a much happier place than the world we live in now. Crime would go down. Preventable diseases would diminish. Instead of worrying about where the next meal is coming from or how to keep a roof over one’s head, people could spend time with the neighbors. Or, better yet, energy could be focused on even more ways to improve one’s community.
That’s a world I want to live in. Sadly, I’m not sure if we have the heart to do it. We like our trappings too much.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Raising Funds, Raising Spirits
I get writer’s block. Badly. I say (in my estimation) pretty brilliant and meaningful things in my head all the time. But, when it comes to writing them down, I freeze. What if nobody likes what I have to say? Worse – what if people think I’m a moron? People can be judgy. I don’t like to be judged, unless your judgment is that I’m awesome. I figure going to Guatemala is as opportune a time as any to turn over a new leaf, so I’m going to try my darnedest to get over that mind block. I hope you like what I have to say. I hope you think I’m cute and clever. I hope my stories speak to you, or, at the very least, you find my musings amusing. But, you know what? It’s okay if you don’t. This time, it’s about me. So, here I go.
I’m spending the next year volunteering in Guatemala with an organization called Safe Passage. I’ll be overseeing the English program for youth and their families who make a living scavenging the Guatemala City garbage dump. It’s going to be hugely rewarding, and ridiculously trying. You get to hear about all the boons and busts along the way. Lucky you.
Since I’ve been out of work for so long (8 months!), and Safe Passage can’t pay my expenses to get to Guatemala, I’ve been fundraising to get here. It was really difficult for me to take the step to do this, since I’ve always been a do-it-yourself-er. I’m so glad I took the necessary step to ask for help – this has been one of the most inspiring and rewarding experiences I’ve ever had! I’m not talking about it being financially rewarding, although it’s been that, too (you guys are generous!). It has been emotionally rewarding to the highest degree. I sent out a plea, and the deluge of encouragement and support I received in response has simply blown my mind. Let me give you a few examples. Let me disclose that I’m not disclosing names. Like any upstanding repository for your money, I value your privacy.
Here are a few select quotes I’ve received from various friends and family over the past few weeks.
“You’re so fabulous. I’m so excited for and proud of you.”
“A lot of people don’t have it in them to do something like this. You’re making a big sacrifice and giving up a lot to go do good work.”
“You have the courage to follow your dreams. That’s really inspiring.”
“You have music in your heart. You deserve the best.”
I have never really seen myself as a risk-taker. I don’t put myself on the line very readily. I get a harebrained idea to go trek around northern Thailand or move to California, but I do it with an organization that I know well in a very controlled and calculated way. I’m still going to Guatemala through a well-established organization, but, come on, that’s just good sense in an area that can be a bit dangerous. I’m pretty much doing this one by the seat of my pants. I didn’t realize how big it was until I had people reflect it back at me (but of course, I only gave myself 2 weeks to gather up my life and skedaddle, so I haven’t exactly had time to ruminate on it). What I’m doing really is super ridiculous. I had an amazing apartment in San Francisco that I loved with a fabulous roommate that has become one of my closest friends. I have a phenomenal group of friends who inspire me to be great while still making me laugh and giving me the freedom to be silly and have fun. And I left everything I’ve worked so hard to build up in the blink of an eye.
It really is courageous to leave everyone and everything you know and love. Of course I haven’t had a job in San Francisco, but I still have built a really wonderful life there. I have amazing friends, not to mention my karaoke spots, my yoga studio, my grocery store, my restaurant, my insert noun here (like Mad Libs!). It’s hard leaving the comforts of home to go somewhere new, especially for so long. It’s even harder when you have to speak another language, which is entirely exhausting to do all the time. Of course, that is, unless you’re fluent, which I plan to be by the end of this thing. It’s also hard when you’re used to coming and going as you please. No longer will I have the freedom to just walk wherever, whenever or even do something so simple as carry a bag. Until I get used to how things work and what draws the wrong kind of attention, I will have to live in a very conservative way. It’s not necessarily bad, it’s just going to take a lot of getting used to. I’m going to miss walking to and fro at all hours. I’m going to miss wearing a pair of shoes because they’re cute and go with my outfit, and not because they look purposely shabby and allow for a quick getaway.
Now, let’s talk about the money. A friend’s ex-boyfriend gave several hundred dollars. Just like that. I’ve never even met him. Personally, I don’t think that that donation was for me exactly, but I’m happy to be the recipient. A good friend of mine is in school living on a shoestring budget of student loans and somehow still gave me $10. That $10 donation was by far the biggest one I received, because I knew it meant that he gave something up. Maybe it was a celebratory drink after finishing finals. Perhaps it was an art show he’d been looking forward to. Whatever it was, he made a sacrifice – a real sacrifice – so that I could go to Guatemala. People believe in what I’m doing that much. It’s both really humbling and incredibly inspiring to know that my friends and family have put that much stock in me. I just hope I can deliver.
Thanks for believing in me.
I’m spending the next year volunteering in Guatemala with an organization called Safe Passage. I’ll be overseeing the English program for youth and their families who make a living scavenging the Guatemala City garbage dump. It’s going to be hugely rewarding, and ridiculously trying. You get to hear about all the boons and busts along the way. Lucky you.
Since I’ve been out of work for so long (8 months!), and Safe Passage can’t pay my expenses to get to Guatemala, I’ve been fundraising to get here. It was really difficult for me to take the step to do this, since I’ve always been a do-it-yourself-er. I’m so glad I took the necessary step to ask for help – this has been one of the most inspiring and rewarding experiences I’ve ever had! I’m not talking about it being financially rewarding, although it’s been that, too (you guys are generous!). It has been emotionally rewarding to the highest degree. I sent out a plea, and the deluge of encouragement and support I received in response has simply blown my mind. Let me give you a few examples. Let me disclose that I’m not disclosing names. Like any upstanding repository for your money, I value your privacy.
Here are a few select quotes I’ve received from various friends and family over the past few weeks.
“You’re so fabulous. I’m so excited for and proud of you.”
“A lot of people don’t have it in them to do something like this. You’re making a big sacrifice and giving up a lot to go do good work.”
“You have the courage to follow your dreams. That’s really inspiring.”
“You have music in your heart. You deserve the best.”
I have never really seen myself as a risk-taker. I don’t put myself on the line very readily. I get a harebrained idea to go trek around northern Thailand or move to California, but I do it with an organization that I know well in a very controlled and calculated way. I’m still going to Guatemala through a well-established organization, but, come on, that’s just good sense in an area that can be a bit dangerous. I’m pretty much doing this one by the seat of my pants. I didn’t realize how big it was until I had people reflect it back at me (but of course, I only gave myself 2 weeks to gather up my life and skedaddle, so I haven’t exactly had time to ruminate on it). What I’m doing really is super ridiculous. I had an amazing apartment in San Francisco that I loved with a fabulous roommate that has become one of my closest friends. I have a phenomenal group of friends who inspire me to be great while still making me laugh and giving me the freedom to be silly and have fun. And I left everything I’ve worked so hard to build up in the blink of an eye.
It really is courageous to leave everyone and everything you know and love. Of course I haven’t had a job in San Francisco, but I still have built a really wonderful life there. I have amazing friends, not to mention my karaoke spots, my yoga studio, my grocery store, my restaurant, my insert noun here (like Mad Libs!). It’s hard leaving the comforts of home to go somewhere new, especially for so long. It’s even harder when you have to speak another language, which is entirely exhausting to do all the time. Of course, that is, unless you’re fluent, which I plan to be by the end of this thing. It’s also hard when you’re used to coming and going as you please. No longer will I have the freedom to just walk wherever, whenever or even do something so simple as carry a bag. Until I get used to how things work and what draws the wrong kind of attention, I will have to live in a very conservative way. It’s not necessarily bad, it’s just going to take a lot of getting used to. I’m going to miss walking to and fro at all hours. I’m going to miss wearing a pair of shoes because they’re cute and go with my outfit, and not because they look purposely shabby and allow for a quick getaway.
Now, let’s talk about the money. A friend’s ex-boyfriend gave several hundred dollars. Just like that. I’ve never even met him. Personally, I don’t think that that donation was for me exactly, but I’m happy to be the recipient. A good friend of mine is in school living on a shoestring budget of student loans and somehow still gave me $10. That $10 donation was by far the biggest one I received, because I knew it meant that he gave something up. Maybe it was a celebratory drink after finishing finals. Perhaps it was an art show he’d been looking forward to. Whatever it was, he made a sacrifice – a real sacrifice – so that I could go to Guatemala. People believe in what I’m doing that much. It’s both really humbling and incredibly inspiring to know that my friends and family have put that much stock in me. I just hope I can deliver.
Thanks for believing in me.
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